Coffee Stuff

Sitting down to write I find I am looking for my cup of coffee nearby. It’s not the coffee at all that I am reaching for, but realizing that the coffee has simply become a vehicle for what I really crave. As I refill once again this morning I am pondering the flavored stuff I’m putting in it. When did I begin this addiction to the cloyingly sweet non dairy concoction? Knowing how sweet it is, why then do I pour so much in with each cup? I don’t really want to know that answer, I am quite happy just knowing it’s in there. There is anxiety in knowing I have an almost empty jug so low that there’s not enough to properly sweeten that first cup. And lo, the mornings I’ll put that anemic amount in and just make the coffee mad. The disappointment those mornings is palpable, and I’ll vow to never do THAT again. It will get marked on my shopping list as “coffee stuff”.

A delicate balance is to pour the correct combination of too much liquid nondairyartificiallyflavoredpalmoilcornsyrup and regular java until it has achieved the perfect color of beige. Drink too much and the late morning is shot with a blood sugar imbalance, miss out and rue the day. It is an early morning dance to which I have nimbly mastered the steps, using the warm cup as security blanket, so often carried with me from room to room and just as often left on a counter top still full. Ah, the need, the poetry, the love of Cinnamon Hazelnut. Or Marshmallow Cream. Or Peppermint Mocha.

Happy Birthday to me!

On the heels of an “attitude” post, when I had to add in a poor-me aside, I thought I’d remind myself and the blog world that it IS about attitude, and it IS about finding things that make you happy. This picture represents a day quite recently that I felt like a queen, walked on air when in actuality I was walking in mud! I joined my friends in my jeep club on a run to the Barstow area, it was a fairly easy run as far as the jeeping goes, but it was after a heavy rain and the mud holes were the obstacles. The day was warm and still, the company was extensive and boisterous, and the occasion was my 45th birthday. Well the day was coincidently timed but I took the occasion to celebrate. Unbeknownst to me the group passed around a birthday card for all to sign, they gave me a present (Jeep logo of course) and allowed me the honor of “first to find” on 3 separate occasions of geocaching along the way. There was laughing, corned beef sandwiches, m & m’s, and mud. LOTS of mud, the kind that invites you to splash through fast and watch the fan tail coat the jeep from nose to tail, gun it while you’re half way through and coat the guy behind you.

It was a happy day indeed!

Happiness is..

Happiness is not having what you want but wanting what you have

while I'm plagiarizing

I came across this from Charles Swindoll, perhaps you've seen it

The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life.
Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill. It will make or break a company ... a church ... a home.
The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past. We cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable.
The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude ... I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me, and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you ... we are in charge of our Attitudes.

On the postnight of a failed business, a struggle to pay bills, and a shaky world, I am reminded that it boils down to a choice of how I feel today.